One of the ADHD traits is commonly knows as oversharing. I’m not the biggest fan of that term because it may be just the right amount of sharing for some. I’ve always known that I have a desire to share my thoughts and ideas with others.

I saw this in my oldest daughter when she started Kindergarten. She loved to walk into the classroom and tell her teacher something exciting that she’d done. Her teacher, Mrs. Dawson had over 30 students that year and wasn’t always able to stop to hear her story. I could see the antsiness build up in my daughter when she didn’t get the opportunity to share and how much joy it gave her to be able to share her story. My guess is it’s one of the ways those of us with the hyperactive compenent of ADHD are able to release that energy.

Years ago, I heard of the four personality types, Driver, Analytical, Amiable, and Expressive. I immediately clung onto the idea that I’m definitely expressive. Sure, I am a peaceseeking, amiable person, too. And I could certainly analyze and explore ideas in my mind for hours. But my main desire is to express my thoughts, to share them with others. I love hearing what they have to say, too because I super love being with people.

How could this abundance of sharing show up if you have ADHD? If you look at a classroom, the hands that shoot up or blurting of answers are from that immense desire to share. These kids want to share what it is just bubbling up inside of them! I know. It’s happened in me ever since I can remember. It still does if I’m in a group classroom situtation. I’ve gotten better at finding ways to monitor and control it, but the desire has never weakened.

It could show up in artistic form, as well, but from what I’ve seen in kids and adults with ADHD, this need to express or share is more about wanting to connect with someone else, to be heard, to bond. When I look at my husband and my middle daughter who are both artists, neither are expressive in the sense of wanting to let others know what they are feeling or thinking. Any artistic expression is done more from a need to process, not a need to connect. I’m sure there are some who do both though.

For those of us who love to share, I feel like there’s a fascination with the ideas going on in our heads and we are hoping those we talk to are just as fascinated as we are. I feel like I’m fortunate in that I’ve found friends and family members who do love to hear my ideas and thoughts. And I love to hear theirs. But I have enough of my own that if they don’t feel like sharing, I have enough for both of us.

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I’m sure it may sound like I have no awareness of balance in conversations or friendships, but I do. I’ve just found that there are some people who don’t love to share as much, are either more private or may have thoughts and ideas, but aren’t able to vocalize them as easily or readily. Some have told me that they’re actually relieved to be around those of us who will talk more so they don’t feel like the attention is on them when they’re not talking as much.

Back in the day when getting the mail was met with hope of receiving a letter from a friend or loved one, I wrote letters practically every day. I started writing letters to my cousins when I was in 2nd grade. We were penpals and loved writing back and forth. When we got cassette recorders, we’d make tapes for each other just talking about whatever and would mail those, which was super exciting to get!

When I went to college, I wrote letters to friends and family I missed. When my roommates went home over the summer, I wrote to them (sometimes 10 page letters or more!) Most people I wrote to wrote back, but not always. I remember my cousin Kelly telling me once that when she got a letter from me, she felt bad because she knew she wasn’t good at writing back. I’d say she wrote back maybe one out of every four times I wrote to her. I told her that I didn’t mind when she didn’t write back, I was just happy to feel like we were in touch. I think that’s when I realized I meant a lot to me to be able to share with others what was going on in my life.

I’m sure writing about how I’m a sharer makes it evident that I’m just sharing this because I like sharing ?. There’s some truth to that. I’m also hoping that it can help you understand yourself a bit more, for your tendencies or needs to share and to know that’s okay. I’ve heard many women with ADHD say they have friends or loved ones tell them they talk too much. That makes me sad to hear that people can’t appreciate others for who they are. I also know I’ve had to reel it in at times when I can tell I have this overabundance of energy in a conversation and the other person isn’t feeling it (or I’m trying to get the words out faster than I can actually talk, it’s almost like my heart can’t keep up — lol!) In those moments,

I do take a breath and just say something like “I just get so excited talking to you!” and try to take a breath and let the other person have a turn. Or there have been times I’m sharing with a stranger and I can tell they’re not interested. I’ll either tone it down or just be amused inside at the situation I’ve created. Do you ever do that? Kind of laugh inside at what you didn’t mean to do, but your ways are taking over and you just get amused by it all.

It really is a gift to love to share, so if this is you, use it where it is welcomed and I’m sure you’ll be blessing lives.

One of the ADHD traits is commonly knows as oversharing. I’m not the biggest fan of that term because it may be just the right amount of sharing for some. I’ve always known that I have a desire to share my thoughts and ideas with others.

I saw this in my oldest daughter when she started Kindergarten. She loved to walk into the classroom and tell her teacher something exciting that she’d done. Her teacher, Mrs. Dawson had over 30 students that year and wasn’t always able to stop to hear her story. I could see the antsiness build up in my daughter when she didn’t get the opportunity to share and how much joy it gave her to be able to share her story. My guess is it’s one of the ways those of us with the hyperactive compenent of ADHD are able to release that energy.

Years ago, I heard of the four personality types, Driver, Analytical, Amiable, and Expressive. I immediately clung onto the idea that I’m definitely expressive. Sure, I am a peaceseeking, amiable person, too. And I could certainly analyze and explore ideas in my mind for hours. But my main desire is to express my thoughts, to share them with others. I love hearing what they have to say, too because I super love being with people.

How could this abundance of sharing show up if you have ADHD? If you look at a classroom, the hands that shoot up or blurting of answers are from that immense desire to share. These kids want to share what it is just bubbling up inside of them! I know. It’s happened in me ever since I can remember. It still does if I’m in a group classroom situtation. I’ve gotten better at finding ways to monitor and control it, but the desire has never weakened.

It could show up in artistic form, as well, but from what I’ve seen in kids and adults with ADHD, this need to express or share is more about wanting to connect with someone else, to be heard, to bond. When I look at my husband and my middle daughter who are both artists, neither are expressive in the sense of wanting to let others know what they are feeling or thinking. Any artistic expression is done more from a need to process, not a need to connect. I’m sure there are some who do both though.

For those of us who love to share, I feel like there’s a fascination with the ideas going on in our heads and we are hoping those we talk to are just as fascinated as we are. I feel like I’m fortunate in that I’ve found friends and family members who do love to hear my ideas and thoughts. And I love to hear theirs. But I have enough of my own that if they don’t feel like sharing, I have enough for both of us.

.

.

I’m sure it may sound like I have no awareness of balance in conversations or friendships, but I do. I’ve just found that there are some people who don’t love to share as much, are either more private or may have thoughts and ideas, but aren’t able to vocalize them as easily or readily. Some have told me that they’re actually relieved to be around those of us who will talk more so they don’t feel like the attention is on them when they’re not talking as much.

Back in the day when getting the mail was met with hope of receiving a letter from a friend or loved one, I wrote letters practically every day. I started writing letters to my cousins when I was in 2nd grade. We were penpals and loved writing back and forth. When we got cassette recorders, we’d make tapes for each other just talking about whatever and would mail those, which was super exciting to get!

When I went to college, I wrote letters to friends and family I missed. When my roommates went home over the summer, I wrote to them (sometimes 10 page letters or more!) Most people I wrote to wrote back, but not always. I remember my cousin Kelly telling me once that when she got a letter from me, she felt bad because she knew she wasn’t good at writing back. I’d say she wrote back maybe one out of every four times I wrote to her. I told her that I didn’t mind when she didn’t write back, I was just happy to feel like we were in touch. I think that’s when I realized I meant a lot to me to be able to share with others what was going on in my life.

I’m sure writing about how I’m a sharer makes it evident that I’m just sharing this because I like sharing ?. There’s some truth to that. I’m also hoping that it can help you understand yourself a bit more, for your tendencies or needs to share and to know that’s okay. I’ve heard many women with ADHD say they have friends or loved ones tell them they talk too much. That makes me sad to hear that people can’t appreciate others for who they are. I also know I’ve had to reel it in at times when I can tell I have this overabundance of energy in a conversation and the other person isn’t feeling it (or I’m trying to get the words out faster than I can actually talk, it’s almost like my heart can’t keep up — lol!) In those moments,

I do take a breath and just say something like “I just get so excited talking to you!” and try to take a breath and let the other person have a turn. Or there have been times I’m sharing with a stranger and I can tell they’re not interested. I’ll either tone it down or just be amused inside at the situation I’ve created. Do you ever do that? Kind of laugh inside at what you didn’t mean to do, but your ways are taking over and you just get amused by it all.

It really is a gift to love to share, so if this is you, use it where it is welcomed and I’m sure you’ll be blessing lives.